From "busy being busy" to "busy being still"

I had an odd moment over the weekend. I realized that I (1) had NO idea what day or time it was, and (2) still felt as though there weren’t enough hours in the day. How could it be that I had more time and less time all at the same time?

I slowly came to realize what I was trying to do was to keep my world as “normal” as possible - and for me normal means “busy”. Yes, the details have changed but my “Go-Go-Go” mentality hasn’t changed one bit.

But, why?

I’ve discussed with clients the use of keeping to a structure, or at least a similar schedule to what they had been pre-Covid-19. A normal, familiar structure is a coping mechanism that I have promoted throughout my career. When we’re in a state of uncertainty, keeping to what is certain - our “normal” - can help ground us and remind us of what we are in control of.

For better or for worse, these are not normal times. So let’s not treat our time normally. Yes, we continue to have responsibilities; work, family, home, health, etc; things that can’t be ignored. But the need to constantly be busy, aka Productive, is not necessarily helpful right now. If you are genuinely feeling inspired to complete that project you pinned on Pinterest 2 years ago, go for it! If spring cleaning is your thing, then get Swiffering! Or if you’re truly busy with work (as some of us are!), do complete what’s expected of you. But if you’re not feeling hyped up or interested in “doing”, don’t.

If you’re looking for permission to rest, here it is - I give you permission to use your time as you see fit. No judgement, no expectations, no need to please anyone but yourself. Let’s look at it this way: we’ve been given the gift of time. So how do you want to spend yours?

I’ve decided to add more stillness, or less “Go-Go-Go” to my day. Stillness doesn’t mean I’m being lazy. I now consider myself to be busy being still. I have definitely had to stop myself multiple times a day from going back to my former “normal”; turning off the habit of being actively “busy” is proving to be difficult. Here’s the stillness I’ve added:

I echo Charlie Brown’s sentiments…

Namaste

I started a puzzle I bought about 10 years ago. And I’ve been able to practice yoga almost every day. I’ve also cooked dinner and sat down to eat it, all before 8pm. I couldn’t tell you the last time I did that. I colored; I went outside the lines a few times, and hated some of the color combos I ended up with, but who cares? I forgot how much I love coloring! I’ve gone for walks, I’ve read, I’ve watched Netflix/Hulu/Disney+ (guilt free!), and I’ve slept.

These moments of stillness have helped me to feel stable, pleased, stimulated, and relaxed. Even with the feeling of uncertainty, I also feel okay. The uncertainty is okay.

Last night I sat and listened to the rain. It was beautiful. It became even more beautiful when I had the thought, “There’s nothing else I want to be doing or have to be doing right now”. I took time to listen to the rain.

I always had the time to be still, but I also always had the excuse of being “too busy”. I’m so glad to not have that excuse right now. I’ve been missing so much. My hope is that post-Covid-19 I will continue to spend time doing these things. Yes, a more “normal” structure will come back into play, but when it does I will make sure to continue to color outside the lines and listen to the rain.

I would love to hear how you’re spending your time, including any challenges you may be having. Let’s work together to redefine your “time” and your “normal”; please call or email for an appointment.