Inhale, exhale, go to therapy.
1 in 5 people will experience a #mentalhealth condition, yet everyone experiences challenging times that affect their mental health. There are #tools2thrive that every person can use to help those who are struggling. Learn more: mhanational.org/may. #mentalhealthmonth #mhm20
I used to think that I didn’t need therapy. All while having very intense feelings like anger, hopelessness, and irritablty. Unfortunately I blamed myself for feeling these things, telling myself that I was wrong, a jerk, over-reacting, lazy, weak, so on and so forth. Which only led to me feeling worse. Yay vicious cycles! But I didn’t need therapy. No, thanks. I just need to be better. Easy! No problem! I’ll just be better! That sarcasm you hear in my voice is my “So young! So naive!” voice.
And then I became a therapist! Yes, before I ever saw a therapist I became one. Many of my peers in grad school had a therapist, which was what led them to becoming therapists. I wanted to become a therapist to help people (at that time I called it “saving people”, and it turns out that “saving” isn’t a thing. Like, at all.). I was urged by everyone around me to see a therapist - not because of anything in particular but because “therapy is amazing!”. Seriously? Amazing!? C’mon…
I finally had a moment before graduating to go to the school’s counseling center; i felt like it was only right to experience therapy since i was going to be providing it. So i went, without expectation or need (eye roll). it was a brief but encouraging experience that didn’t Seem to make much of a difference but led me to feel like I could check something off my list. The brevity of my therapy didn’t discourage me, but I still didn’t think that I needed it. I was fine! Spoiler alert: I was not fine.
About a year after graduating I was miserable at my first job, heartbroken but not ready to let go of him, having trouble at home, and unable to stop my unhealthy patterns. The time had come to get my own therapist. Bring on the tissues and validation - let’s get therapied!
My therapist was wonderful - friendly, supportive, validating, realistic. She helped me sort through the things I had been feeling and experiencing, and helped me to start recognizing my worth. We talked about the things that brought me to her office, and we talked about things that seemingly had nothing to do with any of it. Many times I felt like i had nothing to talk about, and then i’d take 45 minutes to answer her deep, meaningful question: “How are you?”. Turns out, I didn’t need a reason to go to therapy - being human was reason enough.
So there it is - there’s no need for “a reason” for therapy. your wellness is your reason.
Please try therapy. Try until you find the right therapist. Go even when you don’t want to talk or think you have nothing to talk about. Talk about the tough stuff, and the easy stuff. Make goals, break patterns, cry when you feel stuck, and celebrate when you win.
inhale, exhale, go to therapy.
while you’re at it, Encourage your loved one to go to therapy, ask a friend if they need help finding a therapist, leave my info for your mailman, share the link to one of the websites below in your group chat. You get a therapist! You get a therapist! everybody! gets! a! therapist!
therapy will be difficult at times, may not always feel like it’s helping, and your therapist definitely won’t “save” you. but the right therapist will stay by your side, support you through the ups and downs, and will help you to see that you don’t need saving.
For more information on mental health resources, check out:
mhascreening.org
psychologytoday.com
nami.org